Who is Dr Yekemi Otaru?

In 2023, I attended an Upfront online program helping women worldwide to grow their confidence and find their voice. The course was concise and valuable, even though I didn’t agree with all the views being shared. This blog was born out of knowledge learned from the course to emphasize the representation of women of all ethnicities and all walks of life. 

Dr. Yekemi was one of the many speakers throughout the course, providing a few workshops. I have since forgotten the content of those workshops, but her presence, graciousness, and ease with words have stayed with me. I wanted to know more about her journey; this blog is the best way to do so.

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Name: Dr Yekemi Otaru Location: Aberdeen, Scotland, United Kingdom LinkedIn Profile (feel free to connect with her): https://www.linkedin.com/in/yekemiotaru/

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Tell me about yourself, including your post-secondary studies and your current role: I’m Nigerian and have lived in Scotland for about 19 years. I’m married, and I have two teenage children. My son just went to university last month. I don’t mind saying I was much sadder than I thought I would be about him leaving home. It got me reflecting on the time I spent with them both growing up, whether it’s sufficient, whether it’s okay, how they go out in the world and the influences they’re likely to encounter there. He seems to be doing well, though. 

I became an entrepreneur about seven years ago. I started as an engineer, and I have two engineering degrees. I worked in the oil and gas industry in software-heavy departments. I usually did pipeline simulation or reservoir simulation work on software. People often ask me how I ended up moving to a sales/marketing role, mainly due to a lack of patience from my end and, secondly, a lack of role models and representation as a young, black female engineer in the northeast of Scotland. I just did not see what I would be when I grew up when I looked around me. There needed to be more examples of success in my area. Until two or three years ago, I still used to think about it and feel sad that I didn't remain in engineering roles and become VP of engineering one day. However, life takes you places, and if you're open-minded, creative and willing to take risks, it can take you far. 

Right now, I run a business called Doqaru as the Co-founder, and we're based in Scotland. I run it with Sarah Downs, and we have a team of five of us in total. We're focusing on B2B sales, particularly in companies like those I used to work in, which are engineering-focused, IT, and manufacturing companies that need to sell but prefer something other than sales. They have fantastic products, services and complex ideas that they need to share with the world, but they don’t sell them particularly well. We help them identify the sales competencies in their teams and help them grow to generate revenue and make it more predictable. With our help, they have a better idea of how much revenue they can generate because they've got the data to show it. We also help develop sales and marketing strategies and build sales processes. We have partners worldwide whom we can bring in, such as a CRM system if needed, and we can provide sales training and coaching. We're here to enable sales teams; that's our main goal. 

The final thing about me is that I'm the Chancellor of the University of the West of Scotland - a role I took on two years ago. I’m multi-passionate, and people haven’t come to terms yet with the idea that you can have multiple roles. 

Did your company, Doqaru, recently won an award?

Yes, we did on November 20th, 2023. Our business won the Service Industries Entrepreneur of the Year Award at the Great British Entrepreneur Awards in London.

What would you describe as your greatest accomplishment? Why was it so significant to you? My greatest accomplishments are very personal. Today, it's probably my children who've grown up into the people they are, despite a busy childhood with a full-time working mom from day dot. I was busy and there for them in many ways, but there was also that almost grown-up understanding of work ethic and discipline. As a working mom, you may have experienced this. You sometimes worry about the impact of not being home with them all the time. You wonder whether this is going to be a bad outcome or this is going to be fine. Recently, I realized that it was fine and that I was proud of them. The fact that I've been able to juggle a career and my family, particularly my children, is my greatest accomplishment. If I lost my family, if you know what I mean, lost in a figurative sense, along the way, then it doesn't matter how many awards, how many million British pounds you get. It comes down to what your priorities are and what your values are. My great accomplishment is also juggling having a career that makes me a role model; it's not really about money or anything like that. It's about the fact that other people like me, women and those from ethnic minorities, can see someone like me who is just a normal person who came from her country, didn't know anyone in this country, and has done something for herself. At the same time, I didn't lose my family, connections, or supportive community.

What is a successful woman? When you think about a successful woman, people often say a married woman. She's successful. She's got children. I think it depends on your culture. I think Success is different for different people.

Overall, a successful woman has spent time understanding herself, what she wants to do, and what she values, and she hasn't allowed society or expectations to drive what she's doing at the expense of her dissatisfaction.

So you can be a successful woman if you want to stay home with your children, and for you, that’s what success looks like. Being there for them, and you're not doing it because someone's expecting that of you. 

At the same time, you can be a successful woman if you're in a business, driving your career forward, getting those promotions, becoming an expert in your field and getting recognized for your contribution to the field and the industry. If what you want to do is to start a business, even a small business such as a jewelry business or a corner shop, you are successful. If that's what you want to do and you feel that self-awareness where you understand your role in the world, your purpose, and your day-to-day doing something towards moving yourself closer to your destiny. You're successful because success is not one size fits all. What success looks like for me will look different for somebody else.

Some people are building a business because they want to make billions of British pounds and sell it. Some people do it because they enjoy it and don't mind if it's not making huge money. Still, they may feel fulfilled because it can employ people locally in their community and make an influence closer to home, and they need to think about the big payout.

A successful woman spends time understanding herself and her values, has self-awareness, feels confident to take risks and spends time with her relationships and a support system that gives her that additional boost to do the things she wants.

What advice would you give your 15-year-old self?

I recently found a picture of myself when I was 14, and I'm 44 right now. I was looking at the picture and remembered exactly what I was doing and thinking that day. I used to act in pantomimes, and I think we had just finished practice for a panto, which I think it was The Wizard of Oz. I was the Wicked Witch of the West. I had just cleaned off my makeup and was leaning against the wall in the picture. I remember looking at the picture and thinking I was criticizing myself for forgetting a line or two in the show while practicing.

I certainly felt like the other actors were better than I was, but at the same time, they felt that I was the one who remembered the most lines out of everybody. I got my lines down to a T compared to everyone else, yet, I was in this cycle where I thought I wasn't good enough. People would always say, “No, no, you are,” but I think they were only saying that to be nice, and I constantly criticized myself for every little mistake I ever made. So, what I would say to my 14/15-year-old self is not to be so hard on myself and be more gracious with complimenting. I think at that age, 14/15, if I could see ahead to the things that I would be able to accomplish, to the resilience that had been built into the confidence, then I would not be so hard on myself over forgetting one or two lines or not being the best at some point.

I would be much kinder to myself and spend more time enjoying the moment and enjoying the experience and being present rather than just worrying about what's going to happen, what's already happened.

What skills are essential to be successful? Self-awareness has been the biggest game changer for me. Being honest, and being able to know yourself better than anyone else. By that, I mean spending time observing how you react to things and having the courage to ask, “Why did I feel that way when that happened?” and “What was it about that experience that made me happy or made me sad?”.

For almost a year, I remember marking in the calendar how I felt each day and why, what tasks at work gave me energy, what tasks drained me, and what tasks made me feel like I didn't want to do this anymore. At the end of that, I realized what my purpose was, what I was good at, and what I was not.

If you keep doing things you don't enjoy daily, it can be incredibly difficult to succeed. You need to enjoy it. It needs to be something you enjoy and, ultimately, something you become good at. You don't need to be good at it initially when you're enjoying it. If you enjoy it and keep doing it, practice makes perfect. You build that mastery in.

Another thing is being kind to people and giving people the benefit of the doubt. You hear some people say, “People are the problem”. That's not a lie; people are also the solution. If you're trying to build something from scratch and you're trying to get ahead, there are people that you need to relate with, so we have to find a way to connect to people authentically. Whether that is through spending time with them, understanding them or learning what makes them tick so that they feel comfortable around you, you need to build trust with them. Whatever you need to do, find a way to get along with people in a way that makes them gravitate towards you. As part of building that relationship, I would say to be the first to offer something of value. If you are a “take, take, take” person, you'll quickly find that people just avoid you because you're just taking it.

Now, those two things are fundamental regardless of what you're trying to do, whether you're trying to build a business in engineering, whether you're in the fashion business or trying to get promoted at work. Those two things, across the board, are really important. 

When it comes to what you're doing, have that work ethic. Do what you say you're going to do. People need to be able to rely on you. People need to be able to take your word for it; if you say you’re going to do something, you need to do it. Otherwise, people will start feeling like you could be unreliable, and you will start losing their trust. So, regardless of what you're trying to do, that will be crucial.

As well, become an expert in your craft, and that's about working hard. It's always about working hard. 

Finally, build a personal brand. CVs (resumes) are becoming less and less important. It is really about how you're giving back to the community and the value you bring and being clear about what that value is, which is the personal brand. People need to be able to know what you stand for. Tell people what your values are, and then live that, so they have evidence of that.

In summary, it's about self-awareness, relationships, getting to know people and being someone easy to trust and be around. Do what you say you will do, be reliable, work hard, and finally, create a personal brand. If you've got those four things, it becomes really difficult not to be successful in whatever you're going to do. 

What do you think is the biggest misconception about successful women? I probably already touched on a couple of those, but I want to add that this might be a cultural thing, so it might be controversial, but I'm going to put it out there anyway. I think when “women are successful”, there is still an expectation from society that these women are mild and weak and they shouldn't appear to be successful. That bugs me because it's making successful women hide themselves in a way and not put themselves out there.

The biggest misconception about successful women is that there are not enough of us out there, but there are. Most of us are just hiding our heads down because society has a way of punishing people who stick their necks out. So, I encourage anyone reading this to seek out people who have been successful in their field and ask them to mentor them. These women might not come out and be public speakers. They might not have a column in the magazine. They might not write a book, but they are successful. They're doing well at what they do, but they've just decided to keep a low profile because of some of the backlash you can get when you come out and go: “Oh, look at me. I'm a successful woman. I'm doing all these great things”. 

There are quite a lot of successful women. Depending on how you manage your success, something I said earlier, there is also this misconception that there's one way a successful woman looks. So a successful woman, even a president, is only successful if she has some additional things going on in her life.

I want to encourage people to be kind to people who have been successful and who are putting themselves out there because if they don't come out, then we don't have role models. Our girl children won't see a woman being successful if we continue to make these women feel like they can't come out.

That's one of my biggest bugbears. You'll rarely see a woman say she's successful again because even when you're confident, people expect you to act like you're not. Yet, we don’t see men hiding their successes or being shy about it. 

Do you consider yourself a successful woman? I think in many ways, because of my background and the journey that I've come through,  I see that I have broken a lot of stereotypes and overcome a lot of diversity, and that’s why I'm successful. 

I come from a family where my grandfather did not believe in education. His son went to primary school, but he wouldn't pay for them to go to secondary school. And none of his daughters went to primary school. So again, I was fortunate that my father didn't have this view, and I'm highly educated. Now, I'm talking about one generation away. I could have been the fifth wife of some African chief. Coming from that, taking the education, taking chances, and the number of times I put my hand up even though I was ignored or passed over, I kept putting my hand up. I'm unsure why I kept going; maybe it was just stubbornness. 

I got married early in my early 20s, and my husband always said, “They said no; it doesn't mean everyone's going to say no, go there, try that”. It's been about the supportive community that I've had and the strength to keep going. That's been important. To be able to be a role model for other people has been the absolute best. To see other people say, “Well, if you could do it, then it looks like I've got a really good chance of achieving what I want to achieve”. Whether that is juggling a family and work, whether that is starting a business, whether that is becoming a chancellor of a university, whether that is being a speaker, or whatever that looks like, they've got the representation. Based on that and based on my journey and representation, I've been able to provide to people like me.

Yes, I'm a successful woman!

Who have been your biggest allies to date? My family has been there for me. I haven't had many mentors. Certainly not deliberate ones growing up. In more recent times, maybe in the last 10 years, I was introduced to having a mentor. My family has played a key role, however. My parents, siblings, husband and even my children are rooting for me, and that's been helpful. I also have a faith, and so when things are difficult, I have a place to go to, which has given me strength as well.

Looking at other people and what they've achieved, mainly in the US, there hasn't been much representation in Europe. Certainly in the US, I see really powerful women doing things in the US. I love Michelle Obama, for instance; she's a good role model.

When I'm trying to achieve something and need support, I look for powerful women who I can learn from and who can give me advice. In the last 10 years, that's when I've had access to probably half a dozen people that I can text and go, “I need to interview on this”, “I'm trying to achieve this”, or “how do I approach this”, and they give me their time. My only sadness is that I realized this 10 years ago, and I'm thinking about how much energy and how many tears, sweat, and blood I could have saved myself. If I had known, I would have been able to reach out, and I understand things about mentors and role models. I'm already encouraging my teenage kids. If they see someone they admire or are doing something they want to do, to get to know them and start having these kinds of mentor/mentee relationships, they become a huge ally for you. When you want to go for that job, they're the ones who can do your prep for a job interview with you and introduce your C.V. (resume) to someone in some company.

My biggest allies have been my husband, family, and closest family members, especially being in a country where I didn't have any family here, apart from my immediate family. I had to rely on people's kindness, taking me on board, seeing something in me and taking a chance.

Bonus question: Tell me about your hobby. I learned to knit and crochet when I was eight years old. My mom made a lot of baby things, so she taught me how to knit and crochet. Over the years, I've picked it up and dropped it. I think the most crocheting and knitting I did was when my children were really small, and when I was pregnant and expecting babies, I would do tons. About nine years ago, I picked it up again, and something happened not too long ago. I think it was the start of last year, I was walking along the street and started noticing that it was already getting cold in Aberdeen, with homeless people sitting on the side of the road with bare necks. I was like, it must be freezing, so I went home, and I started. I brought my crochet stuff that had been in the loft, and I started crocheting a scarf. I thought I wouldn’t be able to knit enough scarves for all of Aberdeen’s homeless population, so I checked with my friends who wanted to take part. I went on a Facebook group expecting to get one or two people up for crocheting scarves and giving them to charity or even just handing them out to the people on the street, but by the end of it, I had about 20 people who joined in. I've now got a WhatsApp group for it, a couple of people have left, but I think there are 18 of us now in this WhatsApp group, and in the last year, we have given away 78 items (scarves, blankets, mini socks). We also have the elderly people bringing their unfinished projects for us to finish. That's my crochet story!

A big thank you to Dr Yekemi for her time and for sharing her answers with us. She is a Successful Woman!